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Pete Shelley – Homosapien (1981)

a man walks into a bar to meet his friend…

‘you look different somehow…

‘oh yeah?’

‘did you get your hair cut, new clothes…?’

‘no, I kind of feel different though..’

‘yeah?…, how?’ ‘what do you mean?’

‘well….funny you should ask…’

(launches into the following song, much to the confusion of his friend and the other punters present/ however, they let him get on with it, swept up by the excitement of it all, the guys unerring confidence and the catchiness of the tune.)

‘I’m the shy boy, you’re the coy boy

‘You know that is true now you mention it mate

And you know we’re Homosapien too

‘erm…yeah, i know mate…’

I’m the cruiser, you’re the loser

‘now, just hold on a minute, I…’

Me and you sir, Homosapien too

‘yes, i know man but you just called me a…’

Homosuperior in my interior

‘well, thats a matter of opinion…’

But from the skin out
I’m Homosapien too

‘where are you going with this? yes, i’m a homosapien, you are a homosapien..isn’t everyone these days?’

And you’re Homosapien too

‘Christ sake, i know…could you quit repeating your..?’

And I’m Homosapien like you
And we’re Homosapien too

‘…self!? it is very bloody annoying!’

And I think of your eyes in the dark

‘well, that’s…you never told me that before…’
And I see the star
And I look to the light
And I might wonder right where you are

‘very poetic, I’m flattered but you know i’m straight right?’

All the Gods in the sky, way up high
See the world spinning ’round
But the sun and the moon
And the stars are so far from the ground

‘you know, when you say it like that….oi! OI! hang on! you were calling me a loser a few seconds ago!’

I’m the shy boy, you’re the coy boy
And you know we’re Homosapien too

‘jesus. here we go again. you need to have a drink or something, calm the feck down…’

I’m the cruiser, you’re the loser

‘wtf??!! now that’s the final straw! there is only so much abuse and flattery one can take in one night? Isn’t there??? I don’t know…’

Me and you sir, Homosapien too

‘….yes. we are all the same. the feminine and the masculine. is that what you are saying? 

Homosuperior in my interior
But from the skin out
I’m Homosapien too
And you’re Homosapien too

‘…you are not really answering my question mate. i guess that is not your responsibility as an artist but it is still getting on my nerves this ambiguity spewing out of yee…’

And I’m Homosapien like you
And we’re Homosapien too

‘…are you and christine still going out by the way?’

And the worlds built of age are a stage
Where we act out our lives
And the words in the script seem to fit
‘Cept we have some surprise

‘…i will take that as a no. did she find out about your nocturnal activities?’

I just want this to last
Or my future is past and all gone
And if this is the case
Then I’ll lose in life’s race from now on

‘…think it’s too late for that mate. let me be straight with you….em. me and christine we…

Homosuperior in my interior
But from the skin out
I’m Homosapien too
And you’re Homosapien too

‘….kind of got together there last week, it just happened…we were talking about you and she wasn’t happy, she worried that you might be..into guys as well as girls and well…i had a few drinks…fuck, i’m sorry man. there is no excuse, i’ve been a right shit….’

And I’m Homosapien like you
And we’re Homosapien too

‘are you even listening?’

And I just hope and pray
That the day of our love is at hand
You and I, me and you
We will be one from two, understand?

‘who are you..? are you talking about me again? this is awkward…another pint there please!!!’

And the world is so wrong
That I hope that we’ll be strong enough
For we are on our own
And the only thing known is our love

‘sorry….it could be someone else..big head on me…’

I don’t wanna classify you
Like an animal in the zoo
But it seems good to me to know
That you’re Homosapien too

‘..yeah, you’ve got that far away, wistful look in your eyes…it’s not me…who is it then?

I’m the shy boy, you’re the coy boy

I don’t wanna classify you
Like an animal in the zoo
But it seems good to me to know
That you’re Homosapien too

I don’t wanna classify you
Like an animal in the zoo
But it seems good to me to know
That you’re Homosapien too

‘yeah, you are fuckin lost there man, in your own world….so we can forget about the christine thing yeah? or you can gut punch me anytime you want. i dont want to lose you as a friend mate…i do love you…but not in that way ahem…well, does it matter? love is love yeah?’

I don’t wanna classify you
Like an animal in the zoo
But it seems good to me to know
That you’re Homosapien too

 

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