Yeah, it’s me again! What about it? So kids, have you been mostly naughty or mostly nice this past year? Do you give a s**t any more? Can you tell the difference between good and bad, tolerable and intolerable anymore? left from right? Do your emotions run the gamut of the colour spectrum on a daily f***ing basis? Can you in fact be an absolute s**tbag and a saint in the same moment? A monster and a mensch? A lover and a liar? It’s possible right? The older we
get our ability to contradict, piss off, confuse, adapt, frustrate just increases tenfold right? Argue with me on this if you wish buddyboy, but don’t be surprised if one dark winter evening you find yourself laid out on the sidewalk soaked in blood, alcohol and broken glass from a bottle of fine malt whiskey. Yeah, don’t we just contain the f***in multitudes? Now, get out of my face would ya?! Here’s to that Virgin Mary for gettin knocked up! Praise be to…. Christmas f***in and the Holy Bottle! – Fake Santa. Anyway, happy f***in Christmas I suppose and for any of ye wo give a s**t, here’s a list of stuff i kinda liked in 2014….
Under The Skin
The Grand Budapest Hotel
The Wolf of Wall Street
Guardians of the Galaxy
House of Fools
Stewart Lees’ Comedy Vehicle
Tim & Erics Bedtime Stories
Books? ha ha Yeah, the entire works of Hemingway, Proust and that Russian a**hole!
The Grass Arena – John Healy
I Am The Secret Footballer – Anonymous
Autobiography – Morrissey
Wetlands – Charlotte Roche
I Think Therefore I Play – Andrea Pirlo
Now, thats all I remember, what more do you want!? Dave, you pr**k! You ruined Christmas for me motherf**ker! Forever you s**t weasel, broke my f***in heart (sob)….yeah, I am cryin goddammit! Can’t a grown man cry in this F***in day and age?!! Can’t I just have my dignity? It’s Christmas for f**ks sake!